As a matter of fact, the paragraph Li Tiezhu said had already crossed the line, and the explicit and implicit humiliation of Xiangxie was already self-evident, and the turn at the back was nothing more than a cover-up. But, so what? The audience loved it!
The audience applauded, the audience cheered, the audience enjoyed it.
After all, for the audience who like the comedy, Yue Yupeng and Yun De She gave them happiness, but some people have reduced the audience’s preferences to vulgarity and ignorance, Yun De She can tolerate, Yue Yupeng can tolerate, the audience can not tolerate, the audience is a sensual creature …… I tolerate your mother!
So the audience heard this paragraph, laughing is too unrestrained, so that there is no spit Yue Yupeng fake kneeling thing, this to be placed in the usual can be more than the past.
Li Tiezhu can not let Yue Yupeng really give him a knee, he looked at the staff of the director’s team on the stage, timing time five minutes, the two of their programme was originally planned to be six minutes.
There is still one last minute left.
Persistence is victory.
But …… what to say? The first two terriers are Li Tiezhu patting his head and talking blindly, and now there is no goods in his head, looking at Yue Yupeng.
Yue Yupeng did not understand the spirit of Li Tiezhu and said: ”I admit it! Our Chinese language is profound and magical! What else is magical for you? Let me see it?”
Li Tiezhu was tempted to say that there was none left, but he couldn’t, so he could only stall for time and say:
“The Chinese language is magical in so many ways, if I were to say I could talk until dawn tomorrow.”
Yue Yupeng: “So magical?”
Li Tiezhu was hurt internally, do you know anything else? Where are the terriers you guys prepared? Take two out and top it up.
Yue Yupeng, however, felt that his words were too weak and completely unworthy of being put out, so, he kept hiding them. The words were written by an old-school comedy scriptwriter hired by CCTV, and they are grandiose and uninteresting, and the standard is really low.
What Donghai tap water from Haidong and so on, old-fashioned slag!
Yue Yupeng disliked it, but in order to go to the Spring Festival Gala, he had been pinching his nose and memorising the script, and with his style it was impossible for him to say such a serious and boring comedy. Now, with Li Tiezhu as a comedian at the helm, he is naturally happy to take it easy, hey, you watch it.
Li Tiezhu said, “It’s good that you believe it, then our programme can be almost over.”
There are no more words.
Yue Yupeng is anxious, the time is not yet up, how can there be such a short comic? I have been long, very long!
“I can’t believe it, you have to make everyone believe it! Isn’t that right?”
Audience: “Yes…”
Li Tiezhu looked at Yue Yupeng, are you crazy? Isn’t it good to get off the stage decently like this?
Yue Yupeng blinked, you continue ah, brother knows you are the best at pushing.
Li Tiezhu speechless tears, no tacit understanding, really no tacit understanding!
There is no way, spread on such a partner can only continue to hold on, if Qin Tao words, absolutely can understand the helplessness in the eyes of Li Tiezhu.
The water word count drags the length of time is really difficult ah!
I don’t know how those sand sculpture novel authors do it, one more than a water, beast.
Li Tiezhu said, “There is another aspect of the magic of the Chinese language, and that is streamlining.”
Yue Yupeng looked left and right: “Really? How come I didn’t notice it?”
Li Tiezhu: “That’s because you are surrounded by a bunch of chatterboxes with idle mouths.”
Yue Yupeng said, “Then you explain to me how the Chinese language has been streamlined.”
Li Tiezhu said, “You just say a sentence, my translation will always be more streamlined than yours, don’t believe me try.”
Yue Yupeng also sobered up a bit from the panic just now, the familiar typhoon came back, covered his mouth, showing a lewd face, “Really? So amazing!”
Li Tiezhu: “b*tch!”
Yue Yupeng: “Huh?”
Li Tiezhu spread his hands: “Translation! You just six words, I translate one word. Really? That’s amazing, b*tch! Is it accurate? Guys?”
“Accurate!”
The audience chanted in unison, it was so accurate.
Yue Yupeng: “Ah, that’s a start.”
Li Tiezhu: “Right.”
Yue Yupeng’s eyes rolled, no longer too nervous, his obscene intellect took over the high ground again, “Let’s see, let’s give you a tough one. Well …… Yu Qian hot head! Haha! Yu Qian perm head! Four words, I’ll see how you can streamline it.”
“Phew~”
The audience was up in arms, this was routine, who let Yu Qian indirectly go to the Spring Festival Gala? Must pant a wave, otherwise sorry donkey.
Li Tiezhu looked at Yue Yupeng.
Yue Yupeng: “Don’t look at me ah, you say ah! Streamline ah! Hey!”
Li Tiezhu: “Villainous.”
“You tube me.”
“Look at me.”
“Say.”
“Three words, four words streamlined into three words, not too dignified, but, fitting.”
“Tell me, which three words?”
The audience under the stage was also very curious, at this point everyone could see that this was really f*cking said live, no words kind of thing. Although you can’t see the obvious mistakes, but from the two men’s demeanour you can still see a little bit of anxiety.
Li Tiezhu cleared his throat and said, “Yu Qian’s hot head – Shi Niang Le!”
Yue Yupeng was bewildered: “How Shifu Niang Le? What does it mean?”
A few male audience members under the stage understood in seconds, “Phew……”
Doing hair this terrier, all the people know ah.
Yue Yupeng can not help it, want to hold back the anachronistic smile, but the body can not control it, the smile is weird: “Puh huh …… what does it mean ah? You …… you are boring! You vulgar! What teacher’s wife? Have anything to do with you?”
Li Tiezhu said, “How is vulgar? Shifu Niang, Tao Zi is my brother, Qin Tao’s Shifu is my Shifu Niang. Shi Niang Le, what’s wrong?”
Yue Yupeng: “No, you are disrespectful, easy to misunderstand.”
Li Tiezhu: “How is it misunderstood? Yu teacher perm after young and handsome, the teacher’s wife happy, unreasonable?”
Yue Yupeng: “Ah, such a joy ah?”
Li Tiezhu directly turn the microphone, to the audience, the audience also give strength: “So you think? Hahaha ……”
Yue Yupeng covered his face: “I thought …… I thought that the teacher’s wife also went to perm.”
“Phew……”
“How’s that?”
“This doesn’t count, again, I said …… Sun Chao has a tummy.”
“I’ll do it.”
“Ooh! Listen to the next question again, um …… Sun Wukong seventy-two changes.”
“Gross!”
“Huh? Hahahahaha …… This is apt, this is apt, it’s all millimetres …… Please listen to the question …… Guo Gangde.”
“Peach!”
“Zhao Mushan.”
“Abduction!”
“Hahahahaha …… burp! Chinese is amazing, well, go back and die, listen to the question again, Xiangqi Association.”
“Xiang Xiang Association.”
“Doubtful shoes for broken shoes.”
“Xiangxie.”
“Uh-huh! Wish myself a long life, oops, listen to the question again, Yue Yu Peng.”
“Egg!”
“Hahahahaha …… I’m crazy, Spring Festival.”
Li Tiezhu stared at Yue Yupeng.
Two words and you’re asking me to streamline? This seems to be a comedy, not a boxing championship must lie down one, right?
Yue Yupeng: “You say ah, aren’t you great? You say ah.”
Li Tiezhu: “I’m afraid that if I say it, the two of us won’t be able to get the money for tonight’s show.”
Yue Yupeng: “It doesn’t matter, as long as we can walk out alive.”
Li Tiezhu: “I don’t really dare to guarantee that.”
“Hahaha ……”
“Phew~”
The audience and the bigwigs on stage burst into laughter, comedy is in offence.
Li Tiezhu asked Zheheman, who was laughing so hard that he was shrinking under the table, “Uncle Zheheman, can I say it?”
Rehman: “It’s okay, feel free to say anything! It’s all Jackie Chan out there.”
This was the first time there was live comic interaction, and the key Hot Hopman answered without thinking, and the lines were sharp and bullish enough.
The audience laughed again.
Yue Yupeng pretended to be nervous: “Wrap it up Azhu, it’s all Cheng Da Long out there.”
Li Tiezhu: “They’re all my masters what am I afraid of? At most, buy them some yo-yo plums, listen up, the two words of the Spring Festival, my streamlining is ……”
Yue Yupeng listened sideways.
Li Tiezhu: “Pant!”
Yue Yupeng froze: “What? What the hell?”
The audience was also confused.
Li Tiezhu despised: “Spring Festival gasp, never heard of it?”
Yue Yupeng shook his head and flung his fat: “No.”
Li Tiezhu: “Hanyu Pinyin do not know? Eat warm spring, Wu I evening, eat warm Wu I gasp. Understand?”
“Hahaha ……”
“Phew ~”
“Refund! Nima refund money!”
The audience laughed themselves silly, this is okay?
Yue Yu Peng: “This won’t work! This won’t work! Must say a new one.”
Li Tiezhu pretended to be difficult: “You want to say the Spring Festival Gala, that I will, the Spring Festival Gala this …… itself is streamlined enough.”
Yue Yupeng laughed: “Nonsense, the Spring Festival Gala is simply not the Spring Festival Gala? I can let you drill a hole? It must be only one word, say! Hahaha!”
Li Tiezhu: “If I answer, what do I say?”
Yue Yupeng raised his hands high and greeted the audience, “How about we call him Comic Teddy if he answers?”
Audience: “Yes!”
Li Tiezhu: “Then I won’t answer.”
Yue Yupeng: “Comic Teddy, Teddy, okay?”
Li Tiezhu: “That’s more like it, listen up, one word ……”
Yue Yupeng: “Well.”
Li Tiezhu stretched out his thumb: “Spring Festival Gala …… year!”
Yue Yupeng looked at Li Tiezhu, and then looked at the audience on the stage.
The audience froze for a second, and immediately applauded and cheered, this answer – lick to the extreme!
Equate the Spring Festival Gala with the New Year, this is a very good licking.
Who the hell said Li Tiezhu stupid? The fool is actually myself.
Yue Yupeng: “Hey! Can ah! Do you think he’s right?”
“Yes!”
Yue Yupeng said, “Then our Chinese is really amazing, we lost, let’s call him together ……”
“Comic Teddy!”
Li Tiezhu: “Short! Hey? Not right ……”
Yue Yupeng: “Still streamlining, indeed streamlining enough, short, hahaha ……”
Then, Yue Yupeng stood out and pulled Li Tiezhu to bow.
Li Tiezhu: “No, I think I can still salvage a little more.”
Yue Yupeng: “It’s hopeless, give up.”
Then, the two bowed together and walked off the stage amidst unusually enthusiastic and unrestrained applause and cheers from the audience.
This improvised comedy, can only say …… very good.
Than a lot of written words of the comedy, much more fun, witty and amusing not to mention, the point is to dare to take offence, what should be said to say, should not be said to say, it is very top.
Hosts Rehman and Liu Xiaoshi are standing on stage.
Liu Xiaoshi: “Thank you Yue Yupeng and Li Tiezhu for the comedy ‘Magical Chinese’, a brainy bit of comedy that will take your breath away.”
Zheheman: “Yes, I don’t think the audience in front of the TV knows that this comedy …… is an improvisation without script or rehearsal. This is the first time on the Spring Festival stage! They did a great job!”