Jung Yeon-ji circled around the monitor, “What’s this?”
Qin Tao: “Monitor ah, haven’t you seen a computer monitor before? It could also be an all-in-one machine.”
Zheng Yan Zi backhanded him with a slap and sent him flying, “We are primitive people, how could we possibly know a computer? You’re not from our tribe? I suspect you are a spy!”
Qin Tao covered his face, “Huh??”
Li Tiezhu snickered, Qin Tao’s bastard was often beaten up by Zheng Yanzi for all sorts of far-fetched reasons.
Qin Tao huffed and puffed and walked back, kicking the stone next to the fire to vent, but kicked Li Tiezhu’s fish in the fire.
“Crouch! Groove! Groove groove ……”
Li Tiezhu hurriedly took a tree branch to pull out the fish, but unfortunately it was already too late, the fish had already been battered.
Qin Tao looked innocent: “Try it, is it cooked?”
Li Tiezhu’s expression was similar to constipation.
Qin Tao: “It’s okay if it’s mushy, you can’t waste food, surviving in the wild isn’t that easy? Right? Be strong!”
Li Tiezhu said in his heart, “I’m strong, you big man!
The pop-up screen:
“It’s too enjoyable, I finally know why the programme group arranged three guests like this, to restrain each other.”
“Li Tie Zhu > Zheng Yan Zi > Qin Tao > Li Tie Zhu, infinite loop.”
“The three of them are high school classmates, they are very close.”
“Three stars from one class is also impressive.”
“Jung Yeonji is the strongest, only nineteen years old and she won the French Open.”
“Don’t watch sports programmes, but Jung Yeonji is really pretty.”
“Oriental Sharapova you open finish hi?”
“Li Tiezhu ate, the fish are scorched, right? Really do not pick.”
“This programme, chased!”
“Never seen any programme that can make Li Tiezhu so miserable!”
“Miserable and miserable!”
At this time, Sun Hip pointed at the monitor and said, “This is the divine mirror for you to talk to the friendly tribes, but because the distance is too far, the communication is not smooth, and it may not always be successful.”
Li Tiezhu’s trio didn’t care about the bullsh*t divine mirror, the fish was baked and they started to eat it, the fire was set up with a stone next to the fire, and the iron pot was filled with water, ready to be boiled to cook the chicken bręąst for Zheng Yanzi.
As a professional athlete, she has always been very harsh on herself, eating boiled chicken bręąst every day.
Other than that, she would just eat hot pot, skewers, barbecue, pancake nuts, milk tea, ice cream, cola, chilli sticks, chips, fried chicken, fries, beer, etc., and by and large she might perhaps still be relatively homemade.
Ha!
Li Tiezhu was nibbling on the grilled fish, when the opposite side of the divine mirror suddenly lit up and sounded familiar music.
At a glance, Deng Chao sent a video call.
Throw!
So it’s a large mobile phone!
For contacting guests who are coming? Like a Mushroom House phone?
Li Tiezhu nibbled on the burnt grilled fish and went to the monitor money to slide the button and connect the video.
“Hello? Hello Brother Chao.”
“Tiezhu ah, let me see you …… haha! What are you eating? Charcoal?”
“Grilled fish. Look, it’s only burnt.”
“Hahaha …… It makes me happy to see you having such a miserable time.”
“What? Are you coming as a guest? Director Archer said this monitor is for talking to guests.”
“Don’t get me wrong! I’m not really going to come, I just like to see where you guys are at.”
“Well, there are mountains in front of and behind us, no houses, no food, no electricity, and the fires are all just drilled wood.”
“You know how to drill wood for fire? Heh heh! That’s funny.”
“Want to come? The view is great.”
“Well …… determined not to come, I’m stupid! You’re so tough, are chewing charcoal, I come to follow the north-west wind ah? I do not!”
“This is grilled fish.”
“It’s fish being roasted into charcoal! Holy sh*t, I’m laughing my arse off, no, I have to record the screen and send it to Fawn. Hahaha ……”
“So, Chao! Did you type this video just to laugh at me?”
“Otherwise? It’s rare to come across something so happy, how can I miss it? Hahahahaha …… You turn the camera around, I’ll take a look at the surroundings.”
“Hang up.”
“Don’t, I just recorded it ……”
“Doh!”
Li Tiezhu hung up the video angrily, Deng Chao was too inappropriate! If I had known this, I should have abused him a little harder last time when I recorded Fly Away.
Before hanging up, he also looked at the time on the screen, eleven thirty all.
The water boiled, half a catty of chicken bręąst went into the pot.
Li Tiezhu surprisingly also can not help but a little greedy, although the chicken bręąst is not delicious, but after all it is meat ah.
Qin Tao even winds up eating two roasted fish and drools over the chicken bręąst.
Zheng Yan Zi has always been overbearing, after cooking the chicken bręąst, the water is poured out, directly take the kitchen knife in the pot to chop the chicken bręąst into ten or so pieces, after all, the cutting board did not get. Then, sprinkling a little salt, she grabbed it with her hands and ate it.
Pop-up:
“Jung Yeonji is also really brown!”
“Chopping chicken bręąsts in an iron pot.”
“I see dominance in her movements you see, no wonder she’s the champion.”
“This show got the right person, luckily it wasn’t Song Zhu’er who came.”
“Serious brother wouldn’t want Tie Tou Wa to come and suffer.”
“Didn’t you guys notice? Zheng Yan Zi didn’t wear any make-up.”
“It’s vegan make-up, right?”
“No! It’s just pure vegan make-up, when she plays tennis matches, she’s all vegan too.”
“And this show doesn’t even use beauty filters.”
“I’m going, those two’s saliva is dripping out!”
Li Tiezhu and Qin Tao sat on a rock and watched, unable to hold back their harangues.
“Is it delicious? Xiong Er.”
“Average, the meat is not good, but the nutrition is good! Xiong Da, why are you weird?”
“I can smell it too, I want to eat chicken so badly.”
“sl*tty Pig, you should lose some weight, being on this programme is just the right time for you to lose weight.”
“Don’t shout nonsense, my flower name is Jade Face Gongzi.”
“Jade-faced sl*tty Pig!”
Zheng Yan Zi ate a lot, while Li Tie Zhu and Qin Tao were miserable, but there was no food.
Li Tiezhu said, “Looking at this situation at night we can only eat fish, however, we can make fish soup. In the afternoon, we have to do a lot of things, mainly to build shelters, I’ll arrange it, because I’m crippled in this period well, I can’t leave too far, a lot of things to do you guys.”
Qin Tao: “Xiong Er can carry you on his back to cut down trees and stuff.”
Li Tiezhu looked at Qin Tao speechlessly, subtitle set with words: spoilt eyes.
Qin Tao is honest after being punched by Zheng Yanzi.
Li Tiezhu continued, “Firstly, you guys go to the back by the waterfall and cut down five bamboo trees, then, go to the pine forest across the street and collect some turpentine and pine twigs, and lastly, I need a lot of thatch, which is available by the river. These jobs can only be done by you guys this period, I can only do manual labour here.”
Zheng Yanzi agreed with a full mouth, “Good!”
Qin Tao screamed, “How can I finish so many jobs?”
Li Tiezhu: “Sleep in the wilderness if you can’t finish it, take your pick.”
Then, Qin Tao was beaten by Zheng Yanzi again, suddenly much more comfortable, the mood is also positive and sunny, take the axe and follow Zheng Yanzi to cut bamboo.
Five bamboo trees, it took two hours to get them back.
Waiting to get the bamboo, Li Tiezhu side also used stone and yellow mud to build a good earthen stove, at the same time, also used the saw to transform out of ten bamboo tube. At this time, crippled Li Tiezhu was using thatched grass to weave a rope.
Not long after, Li Tiezhu gave Zheng Yanzi and Qin Tao the bamboo tubes tied with the straw rope and said, “Go across the street to fetch the turpentine, it’s very simple, strip the bark off the pine tree, cut out a notch, and hang the bamboo tubes underneath. After receiving enough turpentine, we can keep the fire burning all the time without having to drill wood every time …… By the way, go and cut some pine branches back to use as torches.”
The two men crossed the river and laboured away.
Li Tiezhu used a scornful knife to hitch up the bamboo, and quickly made up a few bamboo hitches, and then made up two very, very crude baskets, and bolted on grass ropes to make the simplest of baskets.
Then, Zheng Yan Zi and Qin Tao came back, each holding a few pine branches more than a metre long, labouring very inefficiently.
This also proved the necessity of Li Tiezhu’s basket.
Send the two baskets to Zheng Yanzi and Qin Tao, Li Tiezhu was about to send them to the opposite side to continue to cut pine branches, Sun Hip Hip this bitch came again, this time, he was holding a pot of rice in his hand and eating, although not very rich, but after all, it is serious food ah.
Li Tiezhu and Qin Tao unanimously swallowed their mouths and were also spineless.
After all, was really hungry ah!
It was past three o’clock from the morning until now, and they had only eaten a burnt grilled fish.
Sun Hip said, “The matter is like this, the first point of accident happened, just now a lovely adult wild boar was disturbed by wolves while foraging for food on the mountain, rushed down the mountain, crashed your newly built earthen stove, and stepped on a newly woven bamboo basket. Fortunately …… the iron pot did not break.”
Li Tiezhu: “Where did the wild boar come from?”
Sun Hip Hop: “Later, remember to make a special effect of a wild boar.”
Thus, when the programme was broadcast, the 50 cent special effect was once again performed, a wild boar that looked like Sun Hip Hip squealed and rushed down from the mountain, crashed the earthen stove and a backpack, and then used the lightweight mastery of stepping on the snow without traces to rush across the river and burrowed into the mountain forest on the other side of the river. The reason why it floats through the water instead of splashing and tripping over it, the programme gives subtitled instructions:
“The water splash special effect is too expensive, give it up, it means what it means. Everyone make do!”
Pop-up:
“Too much!”
“Xiuer.”
“The boar is too realistic, right? It’s almost like Hollywood level special effects.”
“I’m f*cking stupid.”
“The boar’s face, is it a direct PS director’s face?”
“It’s too sloppy ……”
“The already poor family has once again added insult to injury!”
“Li Tiezhu’s craftsmanship is truly awesome.”
“The programme team is too doggy, beat to death to cook hot pot.”
Li Tiezhu was furious, can it still be like this? The fruits of my hard work for an hour ah!
It’s gone just like that?
Sun Hip Hip beckoned, a few staff came up and smashed the earthen stove repaired by Li Tiezhu with a hammer, and stepped on a basket to the ground.
Li Tiezhu: “Shooter, you damn …… this, this is illogical, reasonable, if there is really a wild boar rushing over, I cut it with a knife, I will have food! You guys are not reasonably designed.”
Sun Hip said slowly, “You are now limping, you can not send power, besides, the wild boar is a mistake! What bad thoughts can it …… have?”
Li Tiezhu was speechless and could only cover his face, I am too difficult!
Zheng Yanzi couldn t help but go to beat up Sun Heihei, and was stopped by Qin Tao.
“There are points to be deducted …….”
After announcing the accident, Sun Hip Hip picked up a piece of back to pot meat and shook it, “Look! The best five-flower meat, it’s so fragrant! This is the Heavenly God’s food, envious? Cheer up! Primitive!”
Li Tiezhu: “I’ll add your grandma!”
Later changed the phrase to, “I’ll add you bleep!”