Li Tiezhu is blindly singing some sand sculpture version of “apprehension”, which is a fresh and cute version of a meat ball in another time and space attached to the system.
Then ……
[Ding! The host is immodest, deducting 1 point from the value of decency].
F*ck!
This fucking stupid system, but also deducts the value of decency, also did not expect.
Li Tiezhu’s face was green, the same as the few people around him who had heard his magical singing voice, it looked like …… being disgusted by his own singing voice.
Song Zhu’er applauded, “Good! Super good sounding yeah!”
Zhang Xiaomeng and a few staff members, at the same time, looked at Song Zhu’er and made a personal bar of spicy claws!
Anyone could see that Li Tiezhu didn’t sing seriously, inexplicably comical.
Pop-up screen:
“Li Tiezhu this is because he still hasn’t come out of the ‘Chinese Good Song’, right? Still letting off smoke bombs?”
“I laughed ……”
“The new album is definitely not this song.”
“‘The King Calls Me to Patrol the Mountain’ is already hard enough to say ……”
“Big brother, stop showing off!”
“Please sing a song properly.”
“Suddenly I want to buy the album.”
“Doesn’t matter, the first eight songs are all classics, and it’s okay to let him let himself go with the last two.”
“So Royal Engine, that’s Li Tiezhu’s true style?”
“Why do I like these two songs today?”
“This ‘Disturbed’ makes me really fucking apprehensive.”
“Download it! Make it a wake-up alarm clock.”
“Brother, you’re so desperate!”
“Hahaha …… Li Tiezhu was disgusted by his own singing.”
A total of fourteen issues of “Real Men”, each issue is two hours long, in this era where entertainment is king, not to mention how the final quality, at least it is already considered to be a large quantity. It is important to know that many variety shows are only one hour long in real time, except for the adverts and the cute and stupid show of face.
Before the main film, there is also an hour-long pilot film, in fact, is to participate in the recording of the programme of the six guests of the VCR, only to let the audience first understand the guests, in order to better generation into.
Six guests, theoretically about ten minutes each, but there is no doubt that Li Tiezhu’s length is more than others.
Not because he is the most red, but because he is the most flirtatious, recorded footage to delete which is not appropriate, anyway, the audience also love to see him, simply all left, the length of close to twenty minutes, even Li Tiezhu chaotic singing “apprehensive” are also retained.
Next came a separate interview, Li Tiezhu alone to face the programme team’s questions.
Staff Miss: “Li Tiezhu, why did you participate in the programme Real Men?”
Li Tie Zhu: “Didn’t you guys invite me?”
“Erm …… this this ……”
“Don’t be nervous, is this your first time recording a programme? Relax your mind, I’m a good person to get along with.”
“Ah! Thank you ah! Well, there’s also the question of what do you know about this show?”
“I should have known, but you guys said that for the sake of suspense, you don’t provide any specific show segments or information at all ah. Is it my fault? Where am I supposed to learn about it?”
“Erm …… what just happened doesn’t count, let’s start again. Faced with the invitation from the Real Men programme team, are you willing to go?”
“Didn’t you sign the contract? Can it still be reversed?”
“Ah …… has nothing to do with the contract, are you willing to go?”
“Yes! Very willing.”
“Why? Any particular reason?”
“You guys pay so much money, much, much more than other shows pay. Thanks!”
“Besides the money?”
“There’s also advertising endorsements! It’s a lot of money too.”
“Erm ……”
“Huh? Why are you stuck again? It’s okay, don’t be nervous, I’ll wait for you to adjust your state. Cheer up oh! You can do it.”
“Pfft …… I can’t ……”
The cute and fleshy looking staff member knelt down, a little frantic, how the hell is this an interview?
Several other staff members also cast a sympathetic gaze towards him.
Li Tiezhu smiled faintly, waiting patiently for the other party to vent and adjust, it is really a newcomer with a fragile psychological quality, it’s really not easy, I want to give him enough patience to let him feel the warmth of the earth.
“Moe stand up!”
The programme team put this segment in the pilot, although the programme staff broke down, but this is very Li Tiezhu, isn’t it? His interview would be too immodest if it was too proper.
The budding young lady didn’t stand up and seemed desperate.
Li Tiezhu came over very kindly, helped the young lady up, took the inscription card in her hand, and smiled warmly, ”Don’t be discouraged, be brave! Let’s do it this way, I’ll help you interview myself, and later cut out the voice of my questioning and replace it with your voice.”
The young lady was even more confused, “Ah ……”
Li Tiezhu made a WINK and said, “Don’t worry, general hosts are not as good as me, you can also learn, everyone says I am a natural host.”
Miss: “……”
Pop-up:
“Missy is so miserable!”
“Debut is defeat.”
“Li Tiezhu don’t you realise it’s your own problem?”
“God damn you guys invited me.”
“Seeing yourself interviewing yourself again.”
“The programme group even cut this out, it’s also a riot.”
“I don’t know how Miss Sister feels when she sees this.”
“The programme group whipped …….”
The programme group has more dog, the next interview was recorded in two segments, Li Tiezhu sat on the left side and asked all the questions, and then sat back on the right side to answer in turn. The programme group did not replace the voice with a young lady’s, but edited the two Li Tiezhu together, a left and a right, a question and an answer, so the magical picture was born.
Li Tiezhu: “May I ask, Mr Li Tiezhu, what are your thoughts on participating in this military defence show ‘Real Men’?”
Li Tiezhu: “It’s a great honour to participate in this show, every boy has a dream of being a soldier, and I’m no exception. I once thought of joining the army when I got into college, and then continuing to study in college after I was discharged from the army. However, the situation did not allow me to do so, and my dream became to become a contractor. Now I can fulfil my dream of the military camp, I am very, very, very excited.”
Li Tiezhu: “What is the reason to become want to be a packer?”
Li Tiezhu: “Because …… my grades may not be able to get into college, and now no education seems to be very difficult to become a soldier ……”
Li Tiezhu: “Then you can also take a break from school to join the army now that you’ve been admitted to Peking University!”
“No, I asked, I now go to join the army should become a civilian soldier, I do not want to ……”
“You prefer to be a real soldier who rides the battlefield?”
“Yes and no. The main thing is that all I do is sing and dance myself, oh, I can’t dance, and when I go into the army I’ll still be singing, and that’s no fun.”
“Next question, this programme is said to be very tiring and very hard, are you afraid?”
“Not afraid, I can eat any kind of hardship, I’m just worried that I’m too stupid and will drag my feet.”
“Really? You are so modest.”
“Not modest, it’s the truth. I don’t have any titles or abilities right now other than being a ten billion dollar film star and a big singer. And I often make mistakes and lose face, well …… still very worried.”
“Did you know that there are a lot of soldiers who are your fans?”
“No.”
“Because of Soldier Assault, many soldiers admire you as the King of Soldiers, and so many new recruits have watched this TV series to join the army.”
“Ah …… I definitely won’t let them down.”
“In addition to training, the programme will also conduct military exercises with other troops, are you looking forward to it?”
“Especially looking forward to it, it would be even better if it could be a real battle.”
“Actual combat is impossible, Mr Li Tiezhu, you guys don’t deserve it.”
“Ah, right.”
“Do you know any of those guests with you?”
“I only know Du Haibo from Xiangnan station and Second Sister’s husband Yuan Heng, these two people @ me on the scarf every day, deep well ice, they all know that I have a grudge with the scarf. Serious people who use scarf ah.”
“Last question, how do you think you’ll do on the show?”
“I’m certainly the awesome kind! Hmmm!”(This line was replayed over and over again in the show that followed, used to slap Li Tiezhu in the face, slap slap slap.)
“Okay, thank you Mr Li Tiezhu for this interview.”
“Wait a moment, I have another question.”
“You say.”
Li Tiezhu said, “Am I considered a proper enlistment? Will it give my family a ‘House of Honour’ plaque? My dad especially wants it, he was so happy when he heard that I was on this programme that he specially called my second uncle to go to the ancestral grave to see if there was any green smoke.”
Li Tiezhu: “Unfortunately, it does not.”
Li Tiezhu: “That’s really a pity ah …… My dad let my second uncle burn a set of military uniforms to my mother, by the way, burned a set to me.”
Pop-up:
“Cowhide.”
“Why doesn’t Li Tiezhu dislike himself?”
“The House of Honour can be okay.”
“It’s true that there were so many people who went to join the army last year and this year because of Soldier’s Assault.”
“Li Tiezhu must be the King of Soldiers!”
“Looking forward to hitting the face.”
“What’s the operation of burning military uniforms to Li Tiezhu? He didn’t die.”
“This damn operation made me numb.”
“Old Li’s family are all talented ……”
The interview is over, there is the next link, check Li Tiezhu’s luggage. Song Zhu’er pushed Li Tiezhu’s suitcase over and opened it for the programme team to film.
The somewhat autistic young lady asked, “Bamboo Er, did you pack his luggage?”
Song Zhu’er shook her head, “He packed it himself, I sometimes go out and it’s him who helps me pack, it’s not like I know how to do it, and I’m still losing things. Buying food and cooking, cleaning, making beds and folding quilts, and packing, isn’t that what boys should do?”
Miss: “Ah …… that, should I bring a thermos cup too?”
Li Tiezhu: “It’s called a WIN cup, bring it and you will win, I’ll bring it on The Voice Good Song and all these programmes, it’s been with me for years.”
“There is such a saying?”
“It’s very spiritual. Calling on our athletes to also bring the WIN Cup, the packet will win and not lose!”
The show had quite an impact and blew up quite a few celebrities.
Hexagonal Warrior Ma Six Scarf: “Believe it, believe it, I’ll bring a thermos cup for the Olympics.”
Fan Little Fatty: “I don’t believe it!”
A long time later, the losing Fan Xiaofat was bitter: “I regret not believing in Li Tiezhu yo ~”
When the recording was almost done, Zhang Xiaomeng jumped out, “You can only bring one assistant? Then who should go? Hei Waer or Stuffy Tuner?”
These two bodyguards have been responsible for protecting Li Tiezhu since the year, not only is their professional ability first-class, but their cooking is also delicious.
Li Tiezhu thought about it, “Neither of them! The two of them are crooked, and they are also foreign retired soldiers, they can’t be allowed to contact our military secrets.”
Zhang Xiaomeng: “You record a programme, also can not contact what secrets ah.”
Li Tiezhu: “Er ……”
Song Zhu’er: “Can’t take them, cost money! These two months do not need to protect Li Tiezhu, let them go back to the rice country to go on leave, give half pay.”
Li Tiezhu thought deeply, “Right! Right!”
And in the yard sunbathing Hei Waer and Stuffy Duner, at this time still want to go to the mysterious and wild eastern army to see the world, that …… is to beat the army of the first division of the cavalry of the United States ah!