Really good things do not come out of the door, bad things spread a thousand miles.
Li Tiezhu didn’t need to think to know that it was Leng Ba who told her, and didn’t know what there was to say about it, probably because they were all happy to see Li Tiezhu suffer.
“Sister Mimi, you know it too? See see see, this is my godson Clip sh*t Crawler, three years older than my brother.”
Li Tiezhu switched the camera to Clip sh*t Crawler, who was lying on the bed reading a storybook.
“Looks like his dad! But it looks much cuter than his dad.”
“Clip sh*t Crawler, call auntie.”
“Hello Auntie!”
“Hey! He’s a good boy. By the way, Tie Zhu are you really going to record Where’s Dad?”
“Yeah, Brother Chicken is lying in the hospital right now.”
“Hahaha …… What’s the first instalment? I’ll definitely watch it then.”
“The third and fourth instalments.”
“Hmmmm, well well well, cheers! Remember to call me when you come to Donghai, sister misses you.”
Yang Mi said crookedly.
“Pfft goose goose goose ……”
Deer Ha Ni laughed out loud, something’s not right! Not right!
Yang Mi was startled: “Who?”
Li Tiezhu embarrassed: “Deer Hani, we live in a house.”
Yang Mi: “Then you do not remind me? Hang up hang up.”
Duh~.
After hanging up the phone, Deer Hani said wistfully, “Tie Zhu, playing quite openly! Loss brother has been treating you as a good person.”
Li Tiezhu justified, “How can there be good people in this circle? There are only good people who have gone bad.”
In front of the child, Deer Ha Ni also embarrassed to ask for details, although the relationship between the two, Li Tiezhu probability will share insights, but at the moment can only first endure.
Li Tiezhu took the mobile phone to play children’s songs to the clip sh*t crawling child, soon he fell asleep, mainly because today a day in the drama group is too tired.
The next day, Li Tiezhu woke up very early, to clip the sh*t crawling child milk wash and dress, and then took him to eat breakfast, and finally took a taxi to the Mango Channel to find the programme team.
Mango station Li Tiezhu familiar ah, soon found the programme team, and on the password.
Then, the two of them got on the car of the programme team, and the destination of this stop was an ancient castle in the suburbs of Changsha City for a hundred miles.
The recording of the programme started.
In the car, Li Tiezhu asked Clip sh*t Crawler: “How is this programme recorded? I’m not sure, I heard that we have to choose a house or something.”
Crawler: “To choose a house, some houses are very big and fun, some houses are very small and not fun, and every time the enemy chooses a house that is not fun. Godfather, you have to choose a good house, choose the house next to the bubble.”
“Why pick the house next to Bubbles? Do you want to be her neighbour?”
“Yes.”
“Why? Do you like her?”
“No, hehehehehehehe …… I live in a big house, she lives in an old house, I’ll make her envy me, hehehehehe ……”
“Clip sh*t crawler, you’ll have no girlfriend in the future if you’re like this.”
“Godfather, what’s a girlfriend?”
“It’s a good friend you can sleep with.”
“Ah …… so ah …… I have to think carefully, the involution serious well.”
Li Tiezhu covered his face, bad! Embarrassed, shouldn’t talk to him about girlfriends this kind of over-the-top topic, the key he also popped out a line from yesterday’s filming, terrible!
The first time to be a father is seriously inexperienced, chatting and chatting did not take the clip sh*t crawler as a child.
Li Tiezhu’s tart operation directly thundered over the pop-up melon eaters:
“I go! Really Li Tiezhu ah!”
“I thought the trailer was a title party, but the result is really Li Tiezhu.”
“Why is Li Tiezhu? I can’t figure it out!”
“Could it be that the programme team is trying to attract attention? Pull up the ratings?”
“Little straight man, let Bubbles envy him, laugh me to death.”
“Can we talk about topics like girlfriends?”
“Tie Zhu’s brain is missing a string.”
“Friends who sleep together …… convinced!”
“Serious brother as always dare to say.”
“Inside roll?”
“Clip sh*t crawl child said what? Little age know too much, right?”
“I laughed out of my nose.”
“It feels like the sh*t-crawler is going to be led astray by Li Tiezhu.”
“It’s already crooked!”
The programme group’s car quickly drove to the ancient castle, the children got off the car and greeted each other cheerfully, humming the Great Demon King high-fived each other very actively.
After the greetings, everyone was ready to go.
Wu Zun said, “Wait a minute! Brother Chicken hasn’t arrived yet.”
So the scene shifted back to Li Tiezhu and Clip sh*t Crawler’s side.
Clip sh*t Crawler fell asleep in Li Tiezhu’s arms, and Li Tiezhu whispered to the camera, “Hello viewers, sorry to disappoint you, Brother Chicken didn’t come. When he was helping me with my guest film, he ate a bad stomach, enteritis, and had to be hospitalised. So, I’m taking his place and bringing sh*t Clip Crawler to record the show, so please understand, thank you. Also, I’m now Clip sh*t Crawler’s godfather, kowtow.”
Pop-up:
“It’s said that Brother Chicken was hospitalised for running the show for Li Tiezhu’s film.”
“Clip sh*t Crawler recognised Li Tiezhu as his godfather, so there’s nothing wrong with Li Tiezhu coming.”
“Godfather?”
“This godfather is too young.”
“I don’t know why, but I suddenly feel a little worried for a few other dads.”
“Li Tiezhu really doesn’t spare any fire from the show, sanctioning it to the end.”
“I want to see him sanction the village chief.”
“Wishes come true in advance! I’ve long wanted Li Tiezhu to come to this show.”
“I thought it was still early for Song Zhu’er to give birth, I didn’t expect Li Tiezhu to parachute in this way.”
Any variety show that had Li Tiezhu’s participation was a hit, and this had become the -industry standard- over the past two years. Even the “Oh Exempt Primitive” which was not favoured at the beginning has become a global hit, and since then, no one has questioned Li Tiezhu’s ability to “bring in the goods”.
Therefore, Li Tiezhu parachuted into the “Dad Where to go” not only the programme team is happy, the audience is also extremely interested.
Li Tiezhu and Clip sh*t Crawler finally arrived.
Getting out of the car, Li Tiezhu and a few first-time artists, greeted each other awkwardly, the children on the contrary, more cordial, only just woke up the clip sh*t crawler a little confused.
Li Tiezhu’s palms were a little sweaty, nodded to a few artists and said, “Hello teachers, I’m singer Li Tiezhu, Brother Chicken is hospitalised, I’ll replace him for a little bit in the next two days, please take care of me! Thanks!”
In fact, last night, the parents received a notice from the programme team knowing that Li Tiezhu was coming, so they pretended to be surprised and asked about Brother Chicken’s condition.
That was about it, and everyone didn’t know each other well in private.
Trainee dad Deng Lu’en was happy to find out that he wasn’t the only fake dad anymore, “Tie Zhu, hello! We’re in the same wave.”
After shaking hands, Li Tiezhu said, “Why do you say that?”
Deng Lu’en: “Because both of us are after the nineties ah, and, both are fake dads.”
Li Tiezhu said, “That’s not the same, I am the pro godfather of the clip sh*t crawler, I belong to the real father.”
Deng Lu’en: “I’m still the inverted twist of Deng’s father.”
“What inverted twist?”
“Inverted Twist is a fruit, it’s a mangosteen, which is my daughter’s nickname anyway.”
“Oh! Quite a chic name.”
“Right? Come! Pour Twister come here, call Uncle Li.”
“Hello, Uncle Lee.”
“Hello, Twister.”
Everyone led their children forward and found five donkey carts, and all the dads started cheering up their timid children, touching the donkeys and whatnot.
Li Tiezhu’s side was different, he asked Clip sh*t Crawler, “Do you know what a donkey’s poop looks like?”
Clip sh*t Crawler shook his head, “I don’t know.”
“It’s oval shaped with a round and shiny appearance, so it’s also called donkey poop egg.”
“Like one of those flattened metacarpals?”
“Pretty much, but black and actually more like the hawthorn pills that open the stomach and strengthen the spleen. When you just pull them out, they still smoke.”
“How did you know that, Godfather?”
“I’ve been driving horses and donkeys since I was a kid, so of course I know, both horse and donkey poop is like that, but horse dung balls are a bit bigger pile.”
“Then, is Godfather …… delicious?”
Clip the sh*t crawler’s face was naive.
Li Tiezhu fell into deep thought and shook his head, “Not delicious.”
Clip sh*t Crawler is quite a bit of regret, probably remembering his old father who is still bedridden, frowning, the dull enemy is bedridden, and there is still no bite of hot to eat.
Pop-up screen:
“Crouching ……”
“Sure enough with Li Tiezhu the picture is different.”
“Not delicious is it serious?”
“Clip sh*t crawler why ask if it’s good to eat?”
“This Li Tiezhu guy wouldn’t have eaten it, right?”
“On the last programme, he said he ate cow dung when he was a kid, so donkey dung probably can’t be spared either.”
“Serious brother is worthy of being a gourmet …… dog head!”
“When I think of Song Zhu’er being this bastard’s girlfriend, I feel that Zhu’er has a flavour!”
“Something’s not right upstairs.”
During the programme, Wu Zun suddenly shouted, “Something’s not right upstairs!”
The several artists looked up, only to see the village chief in a flirty general’s armour, standing upstairs in the ancient castle, with a little fat man beside him. It was time to choose another house, and there were five pictures of houses hanging in front of the citadel.
Then the village headman began to say his lines, which were very long-winded, roughly saying that you had to get past him before you could take the donkey cart into the old castle.
Clip sh*t Crawler says, “Dumb enemy! No, Godfather! The village chief’s sword is so cool!”
Li Tiezhu: “Do you like it?”
Clip sh*t Crawler squinted his eyes and smiled, nodding, “Mm-hmm.”
Li Tiezhu: “As the saying goes, the precious sword is given to the hero, old man I’ll go and come, you wait here for dad!”
After saying that Li Tiezhu ran away, a little fast.
Several other artists were concentrating on the lecture, suddenly found Li Tiezhu ran away, could not help but look at each other:
“What happened to Li Tiezhu?”
“I don’t know.”
“Got an upset stomach, right? Running so fast.”
“I’ll go! He went up to the city tower ……”
Only to see, Li Tiezhu ran up to the city tower, strangled the village chief who was speaking with one hand, and with one hand, he yanked the precious sword at his waist, and quickly got his hands on it.
Village chief: “Cough cough! Bold unruly people, you dare to plot against this general?”
Li Tiezhu turned around: “You continue.”
Village Chief: “……”
Li Tiezhu ran back to Clip sh*t Crawler’s side, without blushing or panting, and handed the prop sword to Clip sh*t Crawler.
Clip sh*t crawling child eyes are full of stars: “Wow! Godfather is awesome ……”
The remaining few fathers want to say something, on the show, in front of the children to grab things, this is appropriate?
Humbug pointed at Li Tiezhu and said, “You are a bad boy for robbing the village chief.”
Clip sh*t Crawler unsheathed his sword: “Godfather is not a bad boy! You talk nonsense!”
Li Tiezhu scratched his head and said to the village chief, “You gave it to Clip sh*t Crawler, right? This knife.”
Village Chief: “Ah ah …… right!”
Li Tiezhu said to Hum, “Look! The village chief gave it to you, didn’t he give you a gift?”
Hum immediately deflated the most: “Dad, I don’t have a gift.”
Hum hum father Du Da-eye angry ah, Li Tiezhu you damn really inappropriate people!